My Covid Journal

I’ve been asked to put this all together so people can read my Covid story. Here’s all of my updates in one place. The text bubbles are updates I sent to a friend, the typed out updates are my Facebook posts.

August 2nd, 2021

August 5th, 2021

August 6th, 2021

So last Friday I came down with a cold. Nothing major, just a tickle in my throat. It got bad enough I went to the doctor on Monday. They confirmed I had a sinus infection and gave me antibiotics.

But it kept getting worse.

Thursday morning I was in the ER and tested positive for Covid.

It hurts to breathe.

I’m doing better today, but still not out of the woods. The staff here at the Seymour hospital has been phenomenal.

All of your prayers and messages mean the world to me. I’m sleeping a lot. Hoping to kick this and be back on my feet soon.

August 6th, 2021

August 6th, 2021

It’s the sheet of shame.

Did y’all know this was a thing???

So, when you’re in the hospital with Covid, and you are being moved from one room to another (ER to X-ray or isolation), they cover you from head to toe with a sheet. AKA, the sheet of shame.

I’m sure the policy was put in place to isolate germs, but I kind of felt like the only thing missing was a bell ringer yelling “Covid patient, Covid patient here!”

August 6th, 2021

August 6th, 2021

I had a setback tonight. I’m feeling pretty miserable. The nurse expects me to be in the hospital for several more days. But he doesn’t know I have 10,000 prayer warriors, all of who have a direct line to the Great Physician.

August 6th, 2021

Such a good reminder for today.

August 7th, 2021

August 9th, 2021

August 10th, 2021

UPDATE:

Good news. I’ll sleep with the nasty facemask on tonight, but then be on lower oxygen tomorrow. Hopefully on low-flow oxygen sometime tomorrow.

Covid is losing this battle.

Original post:

This might not look like a huge deal, but it is.

I’m still far from okay, but I’m back to breathing with high-flow oxygen. And my numbers are holding.

I have a long way to go, but all y’alls prayers and notes mean the world to me.

The best part is that I have peace. This morning God filled me with His peace that surpasses all understanding and I instantly felt so much better.

I would love your prayers for continued healing

August 11th, 2021

Psalm 16 has become very near and dear to my heart. Even before Covid, but much more so now. God is my safe place.

August 14th, 2021

August 16th, 2021

August 18th, 2021

Just a quick update. I’m still in the hospital from Covid, but I’m getting stronger. I appreciate all your prayers.

August 18th, 2021

August 18th, 2021

Covid day 20. Hospital day 14. Finally out of isolation. It was great to see my family today.

Will be in the hospital for at least a few more days building back up my strength.

Thank you for all the prayers, I needed/need each and every one.

Life is hard, but God is good.

August 19th, 2021

August 19th, 2021

Two of the prettiest girls in the world just came to see me. I am so blessed.

August 20th, 2021

August 21st, 2021

August 22nd, 2021

I shall not die, but I shall live and recount the deeds of the Lord.

Psalm 118:17

August 22nd, 2021

August 23rd, 2021

You know you’ve been in the hospital too long when you’re ready to name the water spot on the ceiling that looks like a dog

Related Post: Life is Hard, But God is Still Good

August 23rd, 2021

August 24th, 2021

Health Update:

I am still in the hospital, but I am doing so much better! They are hoping to get me off high-flow oxygen today, then I’ll just need to get strong enough to go home.

It’s been a long hard road, but Jesus was with me every step of the way. I can’t thank you all enough for your prayers, flowers, food, thoughts and encouragement. And my family has been amazing. This has been hard on them and I am definitely ready to get home and love on my kids.

#HeathersCovid

Life is hard, but God is good.

August 25th, 2021

August 27th, 2021

August 28th, 2021

August 30th, 2021

I’m slowly returning to the land of the living. Thank you for your prayers and patience the last month. I should be released from the hospital sometime this week, but I still have a long road to recovery ahead.

The hospital staff is amazing. I can’t say that enough. And my family has gone above and beyond for me. Our church family rallied around them with love, food and prayers. We are just beyond blessed.

Life is hard, but God is good.

September 2nd, 2021

September 3rd, 2021

September 4th, 2021

31 Days. That’s how long I’ve been in the hospital. But today, I’m going home!

I know I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again. The staff at Seymour hospital is amazing. They quite literally saved my life. Well, them, my prayer warriors, and Jesus.

I still have a long road to recovery, but I’m glad I can do it from home; where my family is. I am so ready to be home with them. I’ve missed so much this past month. As my lungs heal, I’ll miss even more, but I’ll be there where they can tell me about it.

Life is hard, but God is good.

September 4th, 2021

Yay for being home!!.

September 13th, 2021

Everyone keeps asking, so I’ll share here. After my month in the hospital, I am home. I am still on oxygen and working hard to rebuild my strength and endurance. It’s not exciting or noteworthy, it just is what it is. I’ll share more when there’s more to tell. After all, life is hard, but God is good.

September 14th, 2021

As I laid on the floor of my hospital room, I wondered how long it would take someone to find me. There was a call button by the bed, and another in the bathroom, and I was somewhere in between. I had blacked out on my way to the bathroom from lack of oxygen. It was the second night of the 31 days I spent in the hospital with Covid.

I pulled off one of the sensors they put on me they monitored from the nurse’s station, but no one came running. After a while, I looked at the area around me and decided I could get up on my own. (I did still need to pee after all.) I moved the leg I hadn’t realized was twisted underneath me. Then I stopped to rest. Finally, I scooted over to the second bed that was in the room and used it to pull myself off the floor. Mission accomplished.

I used the restroom and got back to bed seconds before a couple of nurses came in to check my sensor. After telling them what happened, I was forbidden to get out of bed on my own.

I had Covid/Pneumonia, and it was bad… but it was about to get even worse…

September 15th, 2021

“Deep breaths!” the nurse practically shouted at me. What she didn’t understand was that I couldn’t breathe. It wasn’t that it hurt, but that I was physically unable. Somehow my body had forgotten how.

So, I prayed, Jesus, I’m ready. Either bring me home or breathe for me, because it’s not something I can do.

“Good girl, you’re doing great.” the nurse cooed. I wanted to tell her it wasn’t me, it was Jesus. But between the giant oxygen mask on my face and the whole not breathing thing, talking wasn’t high on my list of things to try.

And I really wasn’t breathing. I couldn’t tell the difference between when she yelled at me and the moment at hand. It really was all Jesus.

Have you ever been surprised that God answered a prayer?

I was. So I prayed, Jesus, I believe, help my unbelief (Mark 9:24). Thank You for filling my lungs with Your breath (Genesis 2:7). You are amazing.

This was the first of countless answered prayers during the month I spent in the hospital with Covid.

September 16th, 2021

“If you don’t put it on and breathe deeply, we’re going to have to intubate. Once we intubate, your chance of survival goes down by like 80%.”

It was the third time we had this conversation. Or, one sided conversation would be more accurate. They had the best intentions, but they needed to put the Bi-Pap on me…

Here’s the thing, I am claustrophobic. Highly claustrophobic. And they wanted me to wear this giant mask that adhered to my head.

Let’s just say I didn’t want to wear it.

And, not like, oh thanks, I’d rather not. But more of an unhinged freak out because it’s over my face and I’m in an uncontrolled panic.

Telling me I’m going to die, doesn’t exactly calm me down enough to put on the monstrous mask.

What does calm me down?

Jesus.

I prayed for Jesus to give me peace and calm my anxious heart. I thanked Him for always being with me. I focused on my prayer until I was relaxed enough to give them a nod and close my eyes while they strapped the mask to my head. If I kept my eyes closed and focused on how great God was, I could wear the mask (with God’s help).

…most of the time.

September 17th, 2021

“If your oxygen isn’t in the 90’s, you’ll need to put the mask back on.” The nurse spoke the words I hated to hear. I dreaded the Bi-Pap machine that sent my claustrophobia into high gear.

Somewhere deep inside, I more felt than heard 92. That was too much to hope for. But still… 92.

When they checked my oxygen level, it was 92% and I gave all the credit to Jesus. Why did I not trust Him with my oxygen level? He literally breathed for me not once, but twice, saving my life. Of course He could help me with the rest of my recovery.

September 18th, 2021

When I was in the hospital, I struggled with anxiety. Struggle is a pretty word for what I experienced.

I’ve lived with social anxiety for years. I know all the coping mechanisms and am pretty good about keeping it under control and avoiding situations where I know it will be the worst (like Walmart in December). But this anxiety was different. Different and out of control. And it wasn’t all mental anxiety. Part of it was a physical reaction to what I was going through. The whole thing was traumatic.

I was anxious about the mask they made me wear. I was anxious about getting out of bed, because I knew it would take all the air I had in my lungs and leave me gasping for more. I was anxious about getting enough to eat (because if my oxygen dropped they would take my food away to put the mask on again).

In the hospital, I had my first real panic attack. The first of many.

If I knew it was coming, I could pray for God to help keep my anxiety at bay. I asked Him to help me trust Him more. To give me the strength to get through it.

If I didn’t know it was coming, didn’t prepare, or my body went into panic mode even though my mind was calm, I found distracting myself worked wonders. I could switch my phone from playing Christian music to a biblical counseling podcast I’ve been listening to. Or, if I wasn’t alone, my mom or husband would help me go through the letters of the alphabet.

A is for our almighty God.

B is for Bible.

C is for Christ.

Etc.

You can do that exercise with animals, food, or whatever, but it helps distract the mind from the freak out the body is having. This shortens the anxiety attack by not letting it get a foothold in your mind.

But the anxiety didn’t end when I left the hospital.

It’s much more under control, however I’m finding some things still make me anxious. While in the hospital, I had a fan blowing on my face. It helped me breathe (at least mentally). Now, if a fan blows on me, I start to panic. I don’t want to feel like I did in the hospital again.

When I was first getting up and around, walking to the bathroom would leave me winded. Even after I got stronger and was home, the bathroom gave me anxiety. I was literally afraid to go to the bathroom. I had to pray my anxiety away one trip at a time.

I’m sure my anxiety experience isn’t over, but one thing that has helped is seeing it for what it is. Which is true for anyone. Once you know it’s a problem, you can learn to deal with it.

Life is hard, but God is good.

September 19th, 2021

I’ve shared a lot about how I’ve clung to Jesus during my Covid experience. But here’s what I haven’t shared…

I haven’t shared the number of days I forgot to read my Bible.

I haven’t shared that once my recovery got underway, I basically told Jesus, “Thanks, but I’ve got it from here.”

That’s not to say I never read my Bible, prayed, or clung to Jesus, He just wasn’t the first thing on my mind anymore.

And do you know what?

While that makes me sad, it’s okay. God doesn’t keep time cards for us. Romans 8:1 says, “There is no condemnation for those who belong to Jesus.” None. Jesus isn’t sitting there ticking off things we failed to do.

Jesus died for those who sin or fall short. Those who’s best just isn’t good enough. He died for all of us, and His blood? It covers all of us. In return, He gives us His righteousness and becomes the Lord of our lives.

And a lord isn’t just a lord when the people are perfect, and neither is Jesus. Once we belong to Him, we belong for all eternity. Even if we forget to read our Bibles.

September 20th, 2021

They call me their miracle patient. After 31 Days in the hospital and a few brushes with death I was able to come home to finish my recovery.

Why is it a miracle?

In one week I went from a machine that helped me breathe to minimum oxygen. My recovery speed was (and is) shocking.

Am I a miracle?

Maybe, but it’s more so a testimony to the power of prayer.

Of course the hospital staff was awesome, and I have an amazing support system. Still, I couldn’t even count the number of people who have prayed for me over the past couple of months. Those who continue to pray for me.

I am beyond blessed and ever so thankful.

September 20th, 2021

So this is semi #HeathersCovid related. For physical therapy I have to do mini-squats and toe raises. My mom does them with me, because, well, why not.

Anyway, so Saturday, we were doing them behind the couch. All the kids were in the living room, and they asked what we were doing. We told them, and one of them said, “You look like Oompah Loompas.”

Which led to all the kids singing the Oompah Loompa song while we finished.

September 20th, 2021

–Health Update–

I realize I haven’t posted an actual health update for a while. So, I thought I’d share this picture of me breathing without oxygen.

Im still on oxygen 90% of the time, but I am doing so much better. I can walk further and do more. I’m breathing easier. I’m not 100%, but I’m getting stronger every day.

Life is hard, but God is good.

September 21st, 2021

One thing I’m still struggling with today is anxiety. My muscle memory recalls it being hard to breathe while walking around and wants to struggle when I do, even if my oxygen is holding steady.

I don’t go into full blown panic mode. But I start gasping for air when I have plenty. I need to recognize it for what it is and cling to Jesus to get me through.

I’m very thankful I wrote “Clinging to Jesus” earlier this year. I use a lot of the same techniques to get me through this experience.

If you haven’t already read it, you can get a copy from Amazon here: https://amzn.to/3zn6IEV

September 22nd, 2021

Survivor’s Guilt…

You’ve heard of it, right?

I never understood it before, but after living through Covid, I do now.

Why did God save me and not so many others?

I lost a very dear friend to Covid. One of the women in my community lost both her father and her husband within days of each other. The death count continues to rise.

I’m reminding myself that God can use all things for our good and His glory… even when we don’t understand it. But that doesn’t keep my heart from breaking for all the families who lost (and continue to lose) loved ones.

September 23rd, 2021

When my son was born with cancer, God gave me a peace so deep I could feel it in my soul. It truly was the peace that surpasses understanding mentioned in Philippians (4:7).

And I had that peace again while I was in the hospital with Covid.

I wasn’t scared. I didn’t fear dying. I wasn’t worried about the millions of things at home that were left undone. Not about any consequences of my absence or death. I had peace. I knew God was in control.

In my worst moments, I had no fear at all. When the hospital staff was worried I wasn’t going to make it, I had peace.

When I came home, I found this Scripture card on my desk. How fitting.

I didn’t do a thing, but God fought for me.

And He won.

September 23rd, 2021

I have to tell you about these cookies some friends sent me. They were made by a woman I babysat when she was little. I adored her. Anyway, that’s only part of what makes them special.

They have all the Bible verses I shared while I was in the hospital. It was such a thoughtful gift it brought both me and my mom to tears.

And, of course, they are delicious.

September 24th, 2021

“God doesn’t do miracles without a purpose.” My friend was telling me what our pastor had said recently.

God did a miracle when He saved my life from Covid and pneumonia last month. There’s no doubt about that.

But the purpose?

I don’t know what it is.

I’m hoping sharing my story gives Him glory, but I honestly don’t know what lies ahead for me. Will I settle back into my old routine as life slowly returns to normal?

I do believe that my healing will be complete. I’m already able to sit around and do small tasks without oxygen. In fact, I’m sitting here typing this right now without oxygen. That part of my recovery was expected to take months.

They say it takes four days to recover for every day you spend in a hospital bed. For me, that would add up to four months or 124 days. I’m on day 20.

I’m not 100% yet, but I’m getting there.

Life is hard, but God is good and He can use all things for good.

September 25th, 2021

The first 13 days I was in the hospital I was in isolation.

Isolation by very definition means alone.

However, I wasn’t lonely.

Partly because I was too sick to care. And partly because I wasn’t alone at all. Jesus was right there with me every breath of the way.

I listened to my Bible app and worship music. I prayed almost continually. It was Jesus and me the whole way through.

However, after isolation, I did relish in seeing my family again. Partly because I was feeling better and partly because, well, I love them. But that wasn’t the end of my time with Jesus. Sure, I spent more time doing other things, but Jesus was still there. He always is and always will be.

September 27th, 2021

I walked to the bridge and back twice today. It’s a big deal because of the hill. And because when I came home from the hospital less than a month ago I couldn’t walk from my living room to my bedroom without sitting down to take a break.

I’ve worked hard at recovering. My husband credits my stubbornness. My mom says it’s hard work and dedication. But I still say it’s Jesus. And I’m not just trying to credit everything to Him to make myself look more holy. I know without a shadow of a doubt that every breath, every step, belongs to Jesus. He is the breath in my lungs. He is with me every step of the way. He’s with me even when I don’t take the time to acknowledge Him.

I do fail to do that though. I fail to see Jesus at work while I’m chasing goals. But no matter what, He remains faithful.

September 29th, 2021

Yesterday was a rough day. I had trouble breathing and had to be on oxygen all day. After two days without it, that was discouraging. But it made me look back at how far I’ve come.

In the hospital, I was on crazy amounts of oxygen and I struggled walking from the bed to the chair. Now I’m walking hills and breathing on minimal oxygen. God is so good!

I’m healing so much faster than anyone predicted and I know it’s all Jesus. He is the Great Physician. I just need to trust Him with the process.

Life is hard, but God is good.

P.S. I’m feeling much better today and am able to breathe without oxygen.

October 4th, 2021

I spent 31 days in the hospital. And today is day 31 of being out of the hospital. I stand in awe of how far I’ve come in just one month.

I walked to the stop sign and back (plus an extra block) without oxygen this morning. I still have to sleep with it on, but other than that, I’m done with it!

Do I still get short of breath?

Yes. But praise God for the small things in life… Like breathing (and being migraine free).

They say it takes four days to recover for every day you spend in a hospital bed. For me, that would add up to four months or 124 days. Here I am, day 31 and crushing it. Go God.

Life is hard, but God is good.